Exiting the cave. For a bit.
Jun. 24th, 2013 08:02 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
chrysillaOoof. Migraine day. Sho many possible reasons, bleh. But it did motivate to read short stories out of an actual book today, because less eyestrain that way. Will probably resume after blahging.
Its odd tho, despite the migraine I've been relatively high energy today, and at therapy and for the beginning of my work-shift I was downright chirpy. This is good, right? I had chili and corn chips for 'breakfast', so I guess corn chips are still magical.
Also hot enough in NYC now that I could wear not-dry-yet laundry out of the house and it didn't matter. Yay?
On a related note, since I'm having trouble getting to bed on time again, and showers sometimes wake me up, or I'm too crashed out to shower *by* bedtime, I should just shower right when I get home. Even if I did have to go right back outside ... summer.
Friday was Solstice, which I wasn't really planning to do anything for aside from change the salt bowl, but friends called towards the end of the work day, and there was park, Italian bakery, and West Village walk fun. So that was quite nice :-). I really miss hanging out in the West Village, I should do that more often. Tho I probably won't attend the Pride Parade this year, b/c it would completely crash me out. But the week leading up and after will probably have a nice energy.
Was a little worried about going to Roccos for meringues, after the cross-glutening incident way back in May. In the past, I'd gone with my friend for meringues, which say gluten free on the menu, but the place is not a dedicated OMGGF bakery. And sometimes I'd crash out really hard after a nite at Roccos. On the other hand, that was months ago, when I would hang out with my friend *late* on Monday nites after work. So it could have been gluten, but it also could have been a sleep thing. I didn't feel any more crashed out than usual on Saturday and Sunday, so yay I can still have other people's meringues :-D
I got things done over the weekend, despite the rising heat index.
Stuck with a short list at CC, so my budget will be less over the limit by the end of the month. As it turns out, they also have an organic corn chips brand, so that's one more thing I don't have to buy at the overpriced-store in my neighborhood ("We sell organic so we can mark it up by 40% yay!").
Picked up the gluten (and several other things) free hair stuff at CC, and yeeesh its strongly scented. Another reason to give my hair more drying time before bed :-P. Will still need a leave-in conditioner/detangler, so I guess I'll still have to go to a fancy shop for one item. Checked Rickies and they didn't have much.
Split the 4 lbs of organic ground beef into chili and meatloaf, and this time I finally cracked the gf meatloaf code. I got a package of puffed rice grains at overpriced-store, and switched them in cup-for-cup instead of breadcrumbs. Used my old JoC recipe, so its a bit underseasoned, and when I realized I didn't have ketchup anymore I subbed in salsa. But way more edible than the last batch, woot. The chili went like normal, and was also a bit bland for some reason, so just added more salt.
Bought a new bunch of bananas, b/c the green ones from the week before were still just green. Today they're starting to turn black from green, but they're still not any softer. Wth, bananas?
Churned another batch of ice cream Friday nite, and finally there was success! Well, mostly success. Split into two containers, one was the soft churned stuff that came easily out of the bowl. The other container was for all the bits that got frozen to the sides of the bowl and had to be scraped, while the first container could sit in the freezer and not-melt. Not sure how the second one is for nomming yet, but I finished the first by Sunday nite. The full fat coconut milk was good, but the chocolate flavor-recipe was a little weak. Next, more flavur. Or maybe just frozen fruit smoothies for a while, b/c Ima be busy for the next couple weeks.
Baked a batch of brownies using saved bacon fat instead of coconut oil or butter, with almond butter subbed in for flour again. I can't really taste the bacon, and the texture came out the same, so I call that a win. Tho I'll probably still make the coconut oil version for Dcon, since my coconut-allergic friend isn't coming with me, and coconut is more "shelf stable."
And sewing happened! After two one-hour sewing sessions on weeknights, and spending most of Saturday on chores, I decided to do 4 hours on Sunday but still in the 1 hour at a time format. Mostly it was 1 hour of sewing with .5-1 hour of other-stuff in between. I don't think I've ever done sleeves so well, and without having to go back and fix misteaks b/c I wasn't brain-melted from hours of sewing-work. Which saved MOAR TIME. I still don't like sewing as much as I used to, but I definitely hate it a lot less with my new time-budgeting strategy.
I just have to hem the sleeves and a few other little things, and it'll be done. Might have to take in the shoulder seams a little bit, cuz my shoulders aren't quite that wide (or maybe that's b/c its made of cotton broadcloth). Also might have to shorten the waist area, but there's already an option for that built into the pattern pieces. But won't know for sure until its 100% done. I am confident that this will look nice for my DCon pattern, so at least I don't have to worry about that.
I only managed to motivate myself to do the laundry last night by promising/threatening myself that I could cut the fabric pieces for the main costume *next* weekend. If the lining isn't here by then, that's OK, I can just work on the rest of the jacket. And the skirt, but that's just a big floofy skirt. Tedious (probably) but simple.
One *other* task I got to on Sunday was to reaquaint myself with the fabric stash and reorganize everything. That was educational. Realized I *didn't* actually need lining fabric for the red velveteen jacket I want to make, which made me feel dumb for ordering it, even tho the new lining is more interesting. But instead of ordering more fabric for a new project, I'm just going to let the old lining sit in the fabric-trunk until I have need of it. There were a few more measures of abandoned fabric from projects I no longer want to work on, they can wait too. Also realized that former DoomCoat lining would make a nice wearable-muslin for the Washu coat, tho I still won't be working on that for DCon this year (tho maybe next year). And a few other bits of fabric got switched between projects. At this rate, I have enough projects to work on until Xmas at least, so no more fabric shopping until next year at the earliest.
And I found two discarded pillow cases that I actually need, yay for not having to buy pillowcases :-) Just tossed them in the laundry, easy peasy.
I also have two big bags of fabric scraps, too small for pattern stuff. One bag for wovens, one for knits. I'm interested in finding a big crochet hook and turning them into some kind of sewing-space trashcan, b/c keeping a bucket next to the sewing machine while I work has been really helpful. But the bucket is kinda not-pretty. Not sure *how* exactly, or if I have enough scraps, will look things over after I finish the Delenn dress. It might be a nice crafting-on-the-balcony project, or home-for-the-hurricane project :-P
There is also a collection of Tshirts that don't fit, or are starting to get a bit worn out (I only wear big tshirts as pjs, not really out of the house). I could make a tshirt quilt, but I don't *need* more blankets. Srsly, I have sho many blankets and pillows already. There are some other nice shirts in there with good potential for refashioning, b/c the shirts are my size but I hate shirts that button at the back of my neck. Very not-compliant with long hair.
Also also, there were some very productive periods of insight into my personal Care & Feeding needs.
Towards the end of last week, there was a cute 'world according to introvert' kind of cartoon that I reblogged on my tumblr. Followed by (a backlash of?) commentary by other folks on how unlike what the cartoon says, extroverts are not all stupid jerks, with additional info on how extroverts work. In the extrovert-guide, the blogger made the VERY relevant observation that most people aren't just one or the other. There are combos and spectrums, and experience is always such an individual thing.
That got me thinking of my usual connundrum of having both extro and intro tendencies. It seems like I do need regular solitude to rest and relax, and to process. Also, most of the creative work I like to do is all solo activity (so far). However, to feel energized, sparkly, and excited I need to hang out with other people and socialize.
I've gotten a lot out of my months of hermitting, and figured out a LOT of stuff about myself and what I need. On the other hand, all the creative work pretty much stalled out (for me, unlike others, I don't find sewing very creative). It seems like I had no *drive* b/c I had no *input*. But with everything I learned from the extended solitude, I'm hoping to balance out a life schedule that allows for both without burning me out this time.
I can also see this playing out in last week's tarot forecast. Emperor, High Priestess, 2 of Pentacles. The Emperor is extroverted, in-the-world energy that creates and organizes and motivates. The High Priestess is more reflective and laid back, and also more cloistered and aloof (less creative than the Empress) for processing and wisdom. And the 2 of Pentacles is about balancing the two, tho being Pentacles/earth, it would also be about grounding.
Noticed a similar kind of balanced-focus between the honey pots I have on my altar. Both are for positive energy/healing, but one is more extroverted, and the other is more introverted in focus. Plus the little one for sleep b/c without fixing my sleep everything is f'ed anyway.
The Supermoon was also full in Capricorn, which can also bring up some of these points. Also, Emperor is vry Capricorn, and HPs is very Moon. Lol, I guess two pentacles could = two revolving bodies in space = supermoon phenomenon. So there was a nice, not crazy amount of symmetry and synchronicity going on once I had a moment to look and reflect.
Luckily I was already planning more social time/events for the next few weeks. Like my needler said, if I'm getting more traction in getting myself moving from social events than needles, I should totally go with that (and save needle monies, lol). I'm hoping it will fix my art problem, which seems more like a lack of motivation than actual creative block. Tho it could still be a combo of both. I'm used to being tired all the time, and have addressed many MANY physical aspects of the problem, and yet things have plateaued.
Its also said of ppl born in the Year of the Dog that we need energy from outside of ourselves to get stuff going. Not necessarily direct motivation/force, but we're reflective of the environment around us. So this isn't a new idea to me, I just didn't realize how *much* otherppl time I really needed.
On the other hand, I've made 'going out more' resolutions more than once in the last two years, and none of them really worked out. Hopefully this time it will.
Just realized that I have brownies at home, and didn't bring any with me today. Durnit. Maybe I'll have one when I get home, but Mondays are late and I don't want to sugar-hype myself out of my own sleep.
Looked over some of the upcoming bills today, and it looks like my co-op maintenance bill is just my electric, at less than $20. Sometimes in June we get this abatement thing, kindof like a co-op wide refund from tax stuff credited to our accounts, and sometimes its been as much as 50% of my maitenance bill. But never all of it. Unfortunately, the bill-pay website doesn't actually show us the *bill* or any explanation, just how much we owe, so I won't know what's going on until we get it in the mail. A very nice surprise, but still weird.
I forgot that this Saturday is Nerd NYC's Recess event, yay! Except that this throws off my fabric-related plans for next weekend. Will keep the food-related chores simple and see what I have time for on Sunday. Maybe do some of the cooking on a weeknight. Also, I'll probably only be there until Geek Trivia and then go home for the nite. Tho based on how I'm feeling *right now* I'm not sure about being active this weekend. Bleh, dumb migraine.
Tomorrow there is also a Steampunk Meetup, and its right near work, so Ima go to that. It leaves me with two hours between work and meetup with which to hunt for exotic hair stuff, and maybe get the French macarons I didn't try on Friday. Should probably pack a dinner-box too, since my financial karma is bad this week. I will not try to finish the Victorian-ish jacket by tomorrow. Can bring it next month, or post pictures on the internet for interested parties.
In a few weeks, might have a gathering at my house with my DCon roommates who all want to do the Steampunk B5 cosplay project. Yaaay people coming over but not too many at once yaaay.
Wednesday I might hang out with an old friend and give him RPG books that have been sitting in my Discardia basket for him for a few months (argh, brainfog). Another couple of friends have claimed items from the basket, have agreed to pay for shipping, and now I have their mailing addys, so I will bring them to the post office either this (if no Recess) or next weekend. There's also a swap-table at Recess, if I go, and I could probably load up my rolling suitcase with stuff and leave it out. I think most of what I have left isn't strictly geeky, but I just need to get rid of it at this point.
Having a few weird attachment issues with a few items, but its less "I luv this book" and more "I never actually read this, but its been on my bookshelf since I was little, who would I be without it?" I've read about similar feelings from people with hoarding disorders, I'm surprised it doesn't come up with me more often. But I really want to not have this giant basket parked out on my floor anymore. Go *away* extra stuff! I want my space back!
<3 Chrysilla
Its odd tho, despite the migraine I've been relatively high energy today, and at therapy and for the beginning of my work-shift I was downright chirpy. This is good, right? I had chili and corn chips for 'breakfast', so I guess corn chips are still magical.
Also hot enough in NYC now that I could wear not-dry-yet laundry out of the house and it didn't matter. Yay?
On a related note, since I'm having trouble getting to bed on time again, and showers sometimes wake me up, or I'm too crashed out to shower *by* bedtime, I should just shower right when I get home. Even if I did have to go right back outside ... summer.
Friday was Solstice, which I wasn't really planning to do anything for aside from change the salt bowl, but friends called towards the end of the work day, and there was park, Italian bakery, and West Village walk fun. So that was quite nice :-). I really miss hanging out in the West Village, I should do that more often. Tho I probably won't attend the Pride Parade this year, b/c it would completely crash me out. But the week leading up and after will probably have a nice energy.
Was a little worried about going to Roccos for meringues, after the cross-glutening incident way back in May. In the past, I'd gone with my friend for meringues, which say gluten free on the menu, but the place is not a dedicated OMGGF bakery. And sometimes I'd crash out really hard after a nite at Roccos. On the other hand, that was months ago, when I would hang out with my friend *late* on Monday nites after work. So it could have been gluten, but it also could have been a sleep thing. I didn't feel any more crashed out than usual on Saturday and Sunday, so yay I can still have other people's meringues :-D
I got things done over the weekend, despite the rising heat index.
Stuck with a short list at CC, so my budget will be less over the limit by the end of the month. As it turns out, they also have an organic corn chips brand, so that's one more thing I don't have to buy at the overpriced-store in my neighborhood ("We sell organic so we can mark it up by 40% yay!").
Picked up the gluten (and several other things) free hair stuff at CC, and yeeesh its strongly scented. Another reason to give my hair more drying time before bed :-P. Will still need a leave-in conditioner/detangler, so I guess I'll still have to go to a fancy shop for one item. Checked Rickies and they didn't have much.
Split the 4 lbs of organic ground beef into chili and meatloaf, and this time I finally cracked the gf meatloaf code. I got a package of puffed rice grains at overpriced-store, and switched them in cup-for-cup instead of breadcrumbs. Used my old JoC recipe, so its a bit underseasoned, and when I realized I didn't have ketchup anymore I subbed in salsa. But way more edible than the last batch, woot. The chili went like normal, and was also a bit bland for some reason, so just added more salt.
Bought a new bunch of bananas, b/c the green ones from the week before were still just green. Today they're starting to turn black from green, but they're still not any softer. Wth, bananas?
Churned another batch of ice cream Friday nite, and finally there was success! Well, mostly success. Split into two containers, one was the soft churned stuff that came easily out of the bowl. The other container was for all the bits that got frozen to the sides of the bowl and had to be scraped, while the first container could sit in the freezer and not-melt. Not sure how the second one is for nomming yet, but I finished the first by Sunday nite. The full fat coconut milk was good, but the chocolate flavor-recipe was a little weak. Next, more flavur. Or maybe just frozen fruit smoothies for a while, b/c Ima be busy for the next couple weeks.
Baked a batch of brownies using saved bacon fat instead of coconut oil or butter, with almond butter subbed in for flour again. I can't really taste the bacon, and the texture came out the same, so I call that a win. Tho I'll probably still make the coconut oil version for Dcon, since my coconut-allergic friend isn't coming with me, and coconut is more "shelf stable."
And sewing happened! After two one-hour sewing sessions on weeknights, and spending most of Saturday on chores, I decided to do 4 hours on Sunday but still in the 1 hour at a time format. Mostly it was 1 hour of sewing with .5-1 hour of other-stuff in between. I don't think I've ever done sleeves so well, and without having to go back and fix misteaks b/c I wasn't brain-melted from hours of sewing-work. Which saved MOAR TIME. I still don't like sewing as much as I used to, but I definitely hate it a lot less with my new time-budgeting strategy.
I just have to hem the sleeves and a few other little things, and it'll be done. Might have to take in the shoulder seams a little bit, cuz my shoulders aren't quite that wide (or maybe that's b/c its made of cotton broadcloth). Also might have to shorten the waist area, but there's already an option for that built into the pattern pieces. But won't know for sure until its 100% done. I am confident that this will look nice for my DCon pattern, so at least I don't have to worry about that.
I only managed to motivate myself to do the laundry last night by promising/threatening myself that I could cut the fabric pieces for the main costume *next* weekend. If the lining isn't here by then, that's OK, I can just work on the rest of the jacket. And the skirt, but that's just a big floofy skirt. Tedious (probably) but simple.
One *other* task I got to on Sunday was to reaquaint myself with the fabric stash and reorganize everything. That was educational. Realized I *didn't* actually need lining fabric for the red velveteen jacket I want to make, which made me feel dumb for ordering it, even tho the new lining is more interesting. But instead of ordering more fabric for a new project, I'm just going to let the old lining sit in the fabric-trunk until I have need of it. There were a few more measures of abandoned fabric from projects I no longer want to work on, they can wait too. Also realized that former DoomCoat lining would make a nice wearable-muslin for the Washu coat, tho I still won't be working on that for DCon this year (tho maybe next year). And a few other bits of fabric got switched between projects. At this rate, I have enough projects to work on until Xmas at least, so no more fabric shopping until next year at the earliest.
And I found two discarded pillow cases that I actually need, yay for not having to buy pillowcases :-) Just tossed them in the laundry, easy peasy.
I also have two big bags of fabric scraps, too small for pattern stuff. One bag for wovens, one for knits. I'm interested in finding a big crochet hook and turning them into some kind of sewing-space trashcan, b/c keeping a bucket next to the sewing machine while I work has been really helpful. But the bucket is kinda not-pretty. Not sure *how* exactly, or if I have enough scraps, will look things over after I finish the Delenn dress. It might be a nice crafting-on-the-balcony project, or home-for-the-hurricane project :-P
There is also a collection of Tshirts that don't fit, or are starting to get a bit worn out (I only wear big tshirts as pjs, not really out of the house). I could make a tshirt quilt, but I don't *need* more blankets. Srsly, I have sho many blankets and pillows already. There are some other nice shirts in there with good potential for refashioning, b/c the shirts are my size but I hate shirts that button at the back of my neck. Very not-compliant with long hair.
Also also, there were some very productive periods of insight into my personal Care & Feeding needs.
Towards the end of last week, there was a cute 'world according to introvert' kind of cartoon that I reblogged on my tumblr. Followed by (a backlash of?) commentary by other folks on how unlike what the cartoon says, extroverts are not all stupid jerks, with additional info on how extroverts work. In the extrovert-guide, the blogger made the VERY relevant observation that most people aren't just one or the other. There are combos and spectrums, and experience is always such an individual thing.
That got me thinking of my usual connundrum of having both extro and intro tendencies. It seems like I do need regular solitude to rest and relax, and to process. Also, most of the creative work I like to do is all solo activity (so far). However, to feel energized, sparkly, and excited I need to hang out with other people and socialize.
I've gotten a lot out of my months of hermitting, and figured out a LOT of stuff about myself and what I need. On the other hand, all the creative work pretty much stalled out (for me, unlike others, I don't find sewing very creative). It seems like I had no *drive* b/c I had no *input*. But with everything I learned from the extended solitude, I'm hoping to balance out a life schedule that allows for both without burning me out this time.
I can also see this playing out in last week's tarot forecast. Emperor, High Priestess, 2 of Pentacles. The Emperor is extroverted, in-the-world energy that creates and organizes and motivates. The High Priestess is more reflective and laid back, and also more cloistered and aloof (less creative than the Empress) for processing and wisdom. And the 2 of Pentacles is about balancing the two, tho being Pentacles/earth, it would also be about grounding.
Noticed a similar kind of balanced-focus between the honey pots I have on my altar. Both are for positive energy/healing, but one is more extroverted, and the other is more introverted in focus. Plus the little one for sleep b/c without fixing my sleep everything is f'ed anyway.
The Supermoon was also full in Capricorn, which can also bring up some of these points. Also, Emperor is vry Capricorn, and HPs is very Moon. Lol, I guess two pentacles could = two revolving bodies in space = supermoon phenomenon. So there was a nice, not crazy amount of symmetry and synchronicity going on once I had a moment to look and reflect.
Luckily I was already planning more social time/events for the next few weeks. Like my needler said, if I'm getting more traction in getting myself moving from social events than needles, I should totally go with that (and save needle monies, lol). I'm hoping it will fix my art problem, which seems more like a lack of motivation than actual creative block. Tho it could still be a combo of both. I'm used to being tired all the time, and have addressed many MANY physical aspects of the problem, and yet things have plateaued.
Its also said of ppl born in the Year of the Dog that we need energy from outside of ourselves to get stuff going. Not necessarily direct motivation/force, but we're reflective of the environment around us. So this isn't a new idea to me, I just didn't realize how *much* otherppl time I really needed.
On the other hand, I've made 'going out more' resolutions more than once in the last two years, and none of them really worked out. Hopefully this time it will.
Just realized that I have brownies at home, and didn't bring any with me today. Durnit. Maybe I'll have one when I get home, but Mondays are late and I don't want to sugar-hype myself out of my own sleep.
Looked over some of the upcoming bills today, and it looks like my co-op maintenance bill is just my electric, at less than $20. Sometimes in June we get this abatement thing, kindof like a co-op wide refund from tax stuff credited to our accounts, and sometimes its been as much as 50% of my maitenance bill. But never all of it. Unfortunately, the bill-pay website doesn't actually show us the *bill* or any explanation, just how much we owe, so I won't know what's going on until we get it in the mail. A very nice surprise, but still weird.
I forgot that this Saturday is Nerd NYC's Recess event, yay! Except that this throws off my fabric-related plans for next weekend. Will keep the food-related chores simple and see what I have time for on Sunday. Maybe do some of the cooking on a weeknight. Also, I'll probably only be there until Geek Trivia and then go home for the nite. Tho based on how I'm feeling *right now* I'm not sure about being active this weekend. Bleh, dumb migraine.
Tomorrow there is also a Steampunk Meetup, and its right near work, so Ima go to that. It leaves me with two hours between work and meetup with which to hunt for exotic hair stuff, and maybe get the French macarons I didn't try on Friday. Should probably pack a dinner-box too, since my financial karma is bad this week. I will not try to finish the Victorian-ish jacket by tomorrow. Can bring it next month, or post pictures on the internet for interested parties.
In a few weeks, might have a gathering at my house with my DCon roommates who all want to do the Steampunk B5 cosplay project. Yaaay people coming over but not too many at once yaaay.
Wednesday I might hang out with an old friend and give him RPG books that have been sitting in my Discardia basket for him for a few months (argh, brainfog). Another couple of friends have claimed items from the basket, have agreed to pay for shipping, and now I have their mailing addys, so I will bring them to the post office either this (if no Recess) or next weekend. There's also a swap-table at Recess, if I go, and I could probably load up my rolling suitcase with stuff and leave it out. I think most of what I have left isn't strictly geeky, but I just need to get rid of it at this point.
Having a few weird attachment issues with a few items, but its less "I luv this book" and more "I never actually read this, but its been on my bookshelf since I was little, who would I be without it?" I've read about similar feelings from people with hoarding disorders, I'm surprised it doesn't come up with me more often. But I really want to not have this giant basket parked out on my floor anymore. Go *away* extra stuff! I want my space back!
<3 Chrysilla