Queen of the Cat People

Haven't started the 100 Things yet, but I've just not been well any weeknight so far. Yikes. Part muscle owch from teh weekend, part mysterious numbing of littlest left toe (which could be from new boots or the weekend back aches), and its also still ragweed season :-P Its making it very difficult to focus at work or home, but I see a doctor about that tonite, yaaaay.

But last night I didn't have to turn on my a/c until bedtime! Even after using the oven to cook bacon for the first time in months. So its that time of year again (as soon as ragweed goes away, ugh).


This year I decided to make some things for the colder weather but not go completely crazy. Except so far it seems crazy, b/c the corduroy I wasn't going to order until October was suddenly on sale the day I got the swatches for it last week, so... argh. I think I'll still count it towards next month's budget, but this is adding to my feelings of financial stupid. Yesterday I got a 4 lb box of fabric, today I got another that's 14 lb, and some of the swatches I got today are *also* suddenly on sale. I feel like fabric.com is stalking me :-P

( Sho many plans )

OK... that's a lot of sewing projects. Maybe January isn't long enough, maybe after the last couple of costume bits I should put a moratorium on fabric shopping until my b'day in May. Especially if I want to do weird things like leave the house, or make jewelry for the Etsy shop. Eeep. Maybe I'll just start with all the deadlined stuff, and work my way out.

With luck, I haven't broke my back this week, or am not developed any permanent or degrading kind of nerve illness, so I can keep up with my sewing without destroying my health. Yaaay.

<3 Chrysilla

O wow, two weeks with no proper update. Tho I did use Dreamwidth to take notes on my tummy history, b/c I finally saw the new GI last week, yay! After losing her number and forgetting to call since late January. Dumb brainfog.

Not much happened the week before my friend's wedding (weekend after my last update) b/c I was busy prepping and overall being stressed about travel. But it ended up really nice :-) ( WeddingCon! )

Last week was ... mixed. Was high on wedding goodwill, but because of the skin irritation the rest of the week put kindof a damper on me. And I had to make a trip to Wallmart for Rich Ppl Whole Foods to get gluten free body lotion and shower stuff. But at least the SoHo location keeps that in its own little area away from most of the annoyingness.

Wednesday I took a half day off so I could finally see my GI, and she is very nice. Didn't dismiss my "oxalates" discovery out of hand, and wants to do the standard list of uncomfortable diagnostic tests. She was actually pleased that I already knew a lot of what she was talking about (other doctors have gotten annoyed with me about that in the past). So the first uncomfortable test is next Monday, before Thanksgiving, b/c I just want to get it over with.

As for oxalates, ( Adventures in Research )

After the GI I had a therapy session scheduled, but I had a big block of time and there was an urgent-care facility between the offices, so I got my skin problem checked out. ( Probably TMI ) My one concern now is that if this is/was viral, and I was just at a *wedding*, I REALLY hope it wasn't contagious :-/ But at least it was short lived. And it wasn't bedbugs, phew.


Thursday I still felt skin-yuck, but teh Pooka managed to get me out of the house for the evening with another new friend. Leading to a WTF? moment at Bareburger on Laguardia, where there was a string of mixups about whether or not my *salad* was actually gf. And the confusion started *after* I'd eaten some of if. In the end, they comped my certified GF salad b/c of all of the freaking-me-out that happened. Not as bad as the dead-grasshopper-salad incident, but still, wth Bareburger? And then we went to a nice cafe in the East Village, where the server was very kind about all my food issues. Ironically, feeding me gets *more* complicated in a vegan place b/c of my issues with dates, soy, and gluten. But overall a nice evening out :-)


This weekend started out OK, but kindof sputtered out. ( Forecast: BRAINFOG )

So today I'm still in zombie mode, but with a shiny new necklace at least. And somehow I made it to therapy on time which is not normal. Does not compute. I think the prednisone I was RX'ed is making me feel weird, but I want to finish out the bottle (Wednesday morning) to make sure the skin problem doesn't come back.

Its weird how I feel like I've come off a really rough week of something, and I really haven't. Its not even been a difficult Monday. Meh.


Realized I should start picking up Xmas gifts for teh fam while I'm having a fiscally responsible month with an extra payday. So that should be fun once I waketheFup. Tho it may be mostly gift certificates, b/c low spoons. If that changes right before Xmas I'ma feel like a jerk tho. Just trying to finish that necklace for *me* was a huge chore, I don't even want to think about making shinies for other ppl these days. Tho maybe that's the Rx talking again?

Also considering a BPAL order, but not a gigantic one. Maybe for Turkey Weekend. At first I thought it was stupidly crazy to type up my full collection into a .doc file, but it's actually been pretty useful for the last week. "That sounds nice, but do I have something similar already? Was that a note I didn't like?" Helped me whittle a list down to two items instead of six. Yaaaaay. I will take any excuse to feel clever these days.



Overall I think I've become steadily less stuff-oriented this year. ( Hail Discardia! )

I did manage to purge some old but pretty jewelry displays to give away (they just don't fit my style anymore), will photograph them for ppl to look at ... eventually. And I still have boxes of books and equipment to ship to friends who called dibs in *March*, so I really need to haul my butt to the post office. Ugh. My mail-scale still isn't working right, so maybe they'll be OK if I send them an invoice for s/h instead of checking with them first :-P


Last week I had new inklings for a puppet/video/youtube project but ... ugh. I really don't want new projects. I wanna finish the old projects. So am keeping this under my hat for now, tho I'll happily take notes in case I ever have that much energy again.

This week's tarot is very OMG BOOM DRAMA CHANGE OMG!( See? )

Despite tarot forecast, I kinda just want to take it easy now. Tho that could still be the short-term Rx talking. I have my GI diagnostic next week, for which I'll have to spend the weekend in preparation (ugh), and then Turkey Day after that, and probably not much happening that weekend either. So there's still a part of my brain that's going 'OMG HAVE ALL THE FUN AND CREATIVE STUFF OR ELSE' but really... I just want to chill. I won't *know* anything new about my tummy until December anyway, so not interested in doing more dietary research.

I was hoping November would be a lot more productive in terms of projects and socializing after WeddingCon, but I couldn't help being sick, and now I want to get this medical stuff over with, so its being productive in its own way. I'm trying a controlled, temporary measure of "F#$% it, I give up" for a couple weeks until then. If I socialize or write stuff, awesome, if not then whatevs.


Unfortunately, I'm also starting to rethink my '2014 MOAR CONS' plan, ( Con = tired )

Now that I think of it, taking a couple of weeks off from actively trying to restart my life may be the change I actually need. Then I can start fixing things again if I feel better after that. But then if it takes me *this* long to recover from a trip to PA, maybe more cons isn't such a great idea afterall.

<3 Chrysilla

[Oops. I wrote most of this on August 1st, and then saved it, and forgot to finish and post it. Well... extra long post today, yay?]

( Last week's body stuff and mild events )

Didn't have the energy or motor function to work on more of my costume stuff last week, but was able to catch up on the weekend, and now all of my costume bits are done for "Steampunk Delenn". Belt with buckle, brooch, wire tiara, triluminary, extra handbag. And some extra doodads requested by our Ivanova, w00t.

Four weeks until DragonCon! Squeeeeeee!

I also spent/wasted some time overthinking my DCon grocery situation. In some ways I wish con would get here faster, b/c then I could put my plan into action and see if it actually works, and then stop fretting about it so much.



Went over the financial 'books' on Wednesday, as it was the very end of June. Not perfect, but a good prognosis overall :-) ( Noms and Monies, Taurus/Virgo mode activate )

( Creative stuffs )

Things worked out logistically for the weekend. I'd put off laundry last weekend, so this weekend I did not have room to start a new sewing project, but then again I wanted to finish all the polymer clay stuff anyway. And I did. Also, I was not overwhelmed by laundry this time b/c no-uber-heatwave, so my apartment is not covered in drying laundry.

I dropped off my fall/winter coats and jackets at a new laundromat, b/c the one I liked closed. And... its a bit sketch. Now I'm regretting giving them the handmade jacket to clean. The store-bought ones would be annoying to replace if lost or damaged, but I'd be much sadder if something happened to my purple jacket. Afterwards I talked with my local friend and there's a less-sketch place I could have gone to, so oh well. On Thursday (or Friday) I'll find out if this was a mistake or not.


Today I'm tired, but in a sleep-deprived way b/c I only got to bed in time for 7 hours of sleep, I had stressy dreams, and then woke myself out of them at a wrong part of my sleep cycle, and so my alarm rang to wake me out of *another* wrong part of my sleep cycle. My energy levels aren't that bad right now, but the brainfog is. But again, in a normal sleep-dep way rather than last week's mysterious wave of fatigue.

As for this week, there's also a Harry Potter fan meetup on Thursday that I might go to if I feel up for it, maybe in my Ravenclaw vest. Otherwise no set plans. Its kinda nice having a wide open week in my dayplanner with so little ink :-)

<3 Chrysilla

My goodness, I feel like I have enough energy for a brief (I hopes) shopping trip tonite. OMG.

Was going to shop Wednesday, but being without after-work noms I wasn't sure I'd make it. So I picked up a bag of potato chips (and a Kind Bar I couldn't eat, b/c I make bad decisions when my blood sugar is low), and sat in the park reading about pagan glamour until I was sure of what I was up for. And I sat there for over an hour, and that's what I was up for, and then I went home. It was really nice tho. An after work habit I would like to partake in more often :-) Which means either developing dinner-boxes, or a rich after work snack that can tide me over until its time to go home.

Also, yay sexxy new boots, but booo having to break them in. I'm starting to wonder if I have the energy to do that much walking. Whups.


Realized last night that while I've been more tired and sleepy overall lately, I'm also less anxious overall. Except for the bug incursion, of course, but then I also recovered from that in record time. So tentative yay. Tho last night I jerked awake a few times (SUGAR! AAARGH!), I *don't* feel like I haven't slept at all today. And of course, now that I'm comfy with my new wake-up schedule, I have to wake up an hour early tomorrow for my allergy shot. *shrugs*

( So... is THIS what detox feels like? )

Also this week, more confirmation that refined sugars, not just chocolate, are bad for me before bedtime. B/c they add to the "Hey its bedtime, lets wake up and do stuff!" pattern that I can sometimes get around, but would rather just not deal with at all. I also think I may be crashed out on Monday & Tuesday *also* b/c of my store-bought meringues habit on the weekend. Only for the last couple of weeks, but I hope that means I can fix it as quickly.


Since I'm trying to cut back on sugar, I'm also slowly succumbing to the desire for ice cream. ( The siren song of sweet noms )

Tonite's shopping trip will be to Home Depot (after eating a Kind Bar that *won't* hurt me), to get stuff for the balcony and bathroom fixing-up. I realized that with all the Greek & Egyptian styled pretend artifacts I have for the space already, I can just stick with that theme. So light colors and subtle patterns. If I repaint the non-folding table I'll probably just redo the white. And that will make plants stand out if I ever have a garden out there again.

Still looking for an "acrylic" medium to seal the "hydrostone" pieces I got at NYRF, but I have some contacts to follow up with that. The vendor doesn't have a website, of course. Blah. But the main goal is to put up the curtain vs. creepy neighbor, the other stuff isn't such a big deal. Will probably get that at my nearby BBB, but I don't want to have to wait for a new one of their coupons.



I'm trying to figure out if all the housework is an overhanging annoyance that really needs to be fixed for the sake of my mental health, or just a distraction from creative projects I used to enjoy b/c of some kind of stage fright (despite the absence of a stage). I guess I feel less horrible since finishing the balcony clean up? But I was feeling more sleepiness at bedtime before that happened. Meh, does not compute yet.

And a new home project is always cropping up, it seems, each time I finish another one. Current list: balcony fixes, bathroom fixes, sweep/wash the inside floors, clean the kitchen (esp top of fridge), and do a makeup purge (yay for soyish and glutenous makeup :-P).



In other news, I think I've done a good job at retooling my wardrobe. It seems like all the things I have for daily wear now make me feel pretteh without too much effort. And putting together my work week outfits in advance is definitely helping me utilize things that I usually forget I have when its 8am. But yah, sitting in WSP with a book and feelin pretteh, that's a nice thing to do when the rest of your day is very zombie-like.



This weekend I'd also like to take some time to just sit with my Sedona book and see what I can do with those techniques when I'm in private. Thus far, I'm always either at work or on the subway. The chapter that didn't make sense on Tuesday was better today, given that I'm still a bit numb but not sleep deprived.

<3 Chrysilla

I think Ima make one of those "Care and Feeding of teh Me" posts sometime soon. So whenever someone asks "What/why XYZ with you?" I can just say, look, here's a list already posted to teh internets. Hooray. Like an Unwellness Resume.

Been having some low points this week, of the emotional sort. Then I remembered that this might be PMS week, and they became less pointed, so that's good. But mostly about "What if this *doesn't* have a fix, what if I'm just struggling and spaced out forever?" And ... I don't really have an answer for that right now, so I'm just going to ignore it until I do. Not the healthiest action, but its the only one I have the brain cells for right nao :-P


In more fun (yet still angst-related) news, someone is making a contemporary Jane Eyre vlog series in the style of LBD. ( OMG FEELS )

Its been trenchcoat & boot weather this week, so that's actually been very pleasant. Also, helped me come to the conclusion that I really need to replace my docs ASAP, b/c I'm tired of worrying about getting trenchfoot from NYC puddles :-P And I realized I can still keep my old Docs, and dress them up for costuming somehow, if I have that much energy ever again. And I think I'm going to risk the Macy's website to get a different style of tall docs than my old pair, b/c I have gift certificates and card-holder discounts (to offset possible future new zipper surgery). And then I'll just have to cross my fingers that they don't screw me over on delivery again.


Health wise, things have been a bit odd this week. ( More tired = Yay? )

Feeling sleepier at night also means that when I finally got my newly ordered cheap dresses home, I totally forgot to try them on. *sigh* ( Possible sewing adventures )

I really, REALLY need to just finish the balcony. C'mon Chrysilla, just suck it up and do it already. Get the things at the home stores, throw out the old stuff, scrub the floor with that nice scrubby broom, put the new stuff outside. The End. You've got a whole extra day to recover from it this weekend. And then one less annoying thing to worry (and blog) about. So hopefully I don't crash out between now and Tuesday.

B/c of the pre-holiday hour off we get in my office, I get to go home at 5pm. Getting me back to my neighborhood 2 hours earlier than usual for a Friday, so all of those nice stores will still be open. Ima try to do all of those things tonight if I can, between home stores and groceries, but at the very least I need to pick up my prescriptions and some noms. Then I can stay in my building all weekend, and just work on household stuff and sleeping.


Is there some way to practice at sleeping until I get better at it? I'm unconscious while its happening, so I've never been able to figure out how.

<3 Chrysilla

So yes, hello, I'm back. Trying to recapture my internet presences. And since I have a bit more presence of mind reclaimed from the chronic fatigue, maybe I will have more will to write the long winded LJ/DW posts I used to. Semi-publicly. Yay?

( Look, tarot! )

I also do small weekly readings for myself with a new deck, both to familiarize myself with it, but also to keep my skills a bit sharper than I was. Mebbe will post that here too.

In other news, I spent winter break ... not so much putting new years resolutions together, but planning new patterns and habits to develop to try and make my life easier. Success has been mixed so far, but I did get waylaid by a really nasty S.I. for a week.

( New patterns of behavior )

I will vanquish thee, brainfog!!!!

<3 Chrysilla

I'm tired of complaining "Boo hoo, its so hot and I'm so tired. WAAAAAH." So I'm reframing the situation. This month is the month of naptime. I will be tired, at home and listless on purpose.

Will continue accepting invites to parties, shows, gatherings, etc. for the next few weeks, and dutifully add them to my dayplanner. But I will STOP feeling guilty about being too tired to attend, if that happens (especially if I go home and cook steaks instead). The exception is my one improv practice, which is only meeting for three Wednesdays this month anyway. And I may miss the last one due to DragonCon prep.

So, see you (in person, not going off the grid) in September. Probably.

[Am sho glad I learned how to cook steaks (in a lazy, unfancy way). The thicker ones will pan-cook for 10ish minutes to only rare/medrare state, but that microwaves into a happy medium at work. And then commence with the omnomnoms :-)]

Anyway, its also a good plan if I want to save my energy for DragonCon. (31 DAYS!!!! OMG!!!!)


Blessed Lughnassa! I spent my weekend cleaning stuff & filing old papers. Replenished the salt dish. There seems to be a clutter quota in my Chantry. I clear off the workbench, kitchen counter, and fridge, but now the livingroom 'nook' is filled with sewing stuff. Its not like I moved one pile of clutter to a different place, its all new clutter. Blah. Still better than the homes of most of my friends that are not Discardians.


Also played with fabric this weekend. ( Me bein' crafty )

I'm sorely tempted to curl up under the circ desk in a sleepy little ball, but it doesn't look like the floor has been cleaned in months. And a friend is stopping by to hang out after work, and bringing shiny things for my consultation.

I may spend one of my Mondays-off this month shopping for fabric at Mood Fabrics in NYC, if anybody wants to tag along. Or I may just use those days to veg out. I had two "personal days" to use before they expired in September, so I'm having two surprise 3-day weekends before DCon :-)

<3 Chrysilla